Sleep

I haven't been sleeping well lately. Well, that's an understatement. I haven't slept through the night once since Monday. I can read into it all I want. I know what's going on. I still don't like it. I haven't tried taking melatonin or Zzzzquil, because I don't want to. I was hoping this sleep issue would only last a day or 2, but it's been 4 nights now. Maybe I should give it more time.

I am frustrated at this aspect of the whole thing. I'm not saying I didn't expect difficult things to come with this, but sleep is so important to me. I would really appreciate it if my sleep wasn't affected. Of course, it's out of my control. Maybe it's time to try melatonin? I think I'll try it tonight.

I'm done feeling this way. Well, ok. Obviously I'm not ACTUALLY done, but emotionally I feel spent. I want this to be done. It hasn't even been as hard as I thought it would be. I figure that means one of a few options. 1-I got lucky, and it won't be as bad as I thought. 2-The truly difficult parts are still to come (please no!). 3-It has been harder than I've allowed myself to acknowledge (I wouldn't put this one past me). 4-It's not actually going to get harder, but it's going to drag on and on for a while.

I'm sure there are options I missed. The point is, this is not something I understand. It's hard. I hate it. I can't make it go away.

The one piece I really need I fall into place, though, is the sleep. Please?